WHO SAID IT WAS A WONDERFUL WORLD?

Was that me? Hell yes it was!! And i meant it. But they say shit happens. Well indeed it does. I ended last week with my 6 month follow up mammogram. That was the most painful one i have ever had. It was a different tech this time. My nice sweet pregnant lady was on maternity leave. And by george this new one tightened the vise. Dang it hurt. I even bruised and i have never bruised from a mammo. Well anyway it was done and over with. Well wouldnt you know they called me back in for more pics. Just like the last one 6 months ago. So i think, again, this is the life of a cancer survivor. Just extra precautions because i have a history. So i went and had more pics taken yesterday. And it was a different lady but she was very gentle. No problems. Well that was till today. My cancer doctor called. Seeing his name on the caller ID of course i knew. Well i have to have a biopsy. And i honestly think, though at this point im in a panic anyway, but i think he wants me to consider a mastectomy on my only surviving breast. Well anyway he is gonna call the surgon and make me an appointment. At the very least another biopsy. Im sure it will be a complete removal of the are of concern. At this point im keeping my breast. Thats just the way it is. So we wait. Yet again. And Pray yet again. Of course i havent quit praying. Maybe slacked off a bit. But i guess i allowed myself to get to comfortable in my own skin. Just goes to show you, you cant take life for granted. So much for my wonderful world. It just came crashing down around me. But maybe im in a panic for no reason. Do you think i could be that lucky? Well i sure hope so. Cause i dont know if i can do this again. Im so emotionally drained. I just dont have the strength. So im gonna try my best to think positive. So for now i will continue to live and love and go on. Somehow, just go on.I dont know how to end this post on a happy note. I just have to stop writing till the next one. So Padiddle!!!!!